Stop selling, start helping.

I heard this expression last night and it makes sense in literally everything I do. As a PR consultant with my own business, I feel that everyone I meet has a target on their forehead....or at least they may feel like they do.

In recent years I've learned that, particularly in Halifax, it's about getting to know people and trusting them. It's lots of coffees and glasses of wine, and even dinners with kids, before you're "in" among the business community members. If you just relax and get to know people, without selling your services, the opportunities to work together come naturally. No ulterior motives, no pressure, just hanging out with fellow business people and learning what they do.

Seems easy right? Not so fast.

Staying in touch takes dedication and maintenance. And when you do go for that coffee, you need to focus on some objectives. How can you work together, do they have contacts you could "borrow" and is there any follow up you should do. Then....follow up. Stay in touch. Ensure this isn't a one off meeting. Show them you mean it.

The same appears to be true in the jewelry sales business, but things are far more immediate. As a stylist with Stella & Dot www.stelladot.com/hollydunn I'm immediately in a position of literally selling jewelry to people. But it's still not that simple.

It's easiest to connect with people who really love the jewelry. You can spot 'em in a crowd. Wide eyes, glinting with the shimmering visions of gems and gold, excited attitude, rushing from piece to piece. Can't settle on just one purchase. It's these people who become my longer term connections. They want to hear more about the company, the jewels. When there is a new line, they want to know about it, and will usually buy a piece. No selling, just staying in touch and helping them connect with beautiful accessories that we can't easily find in Nova Scotia.

As I focus more on this mantra, it's easier to get through work. Work is social and more fun. I'm learning about people and forming deeper relationships. It's a great way to become more connected, and to build your network, so when you need a partner, a service, or just to share how truly gorgeous and hip a necklace is, you have a list of people to call.